When To Wear A Cat On The First Date

c3006d7f6bafc2b3054fd8ba19c8f674The big question…what do you wear on your first date? Your choice may say a lot. About you.  And more importantly, about your intent.  A few months ago, I had this dilemma. I was asked out by a great guy I knew. I suspected I just wanted to stay friends but I wanted to give it a chance.  After all, he’s funny, nice, successful and just an all around good person. So the question remained – what on earth to wear to look nice for a dinner date but still give me the option to play the friend card?

To answer this age-old question, I took the route that most girls take….I asked a friend. I have this practical girlfriend that saw her share of dates before she got married and she always has great, hilarious advice.  The following are her pearls of wisdom. (Of course, take all this as being a wee bit tongue in cheek.)

Scenario: first date-met online so haven’t met in person yet-seen pictures. What to wear: layers. Pants (not jeans). Avoid the dress. Choose a cute top that shows a little and put on a cardigan.  If it turns out you aren’t interested, keep on the sweater. If you are interested, take it off.  The same could be said for a scarf if that’s your style. Wear somewhat comfortable shoes but be fashionable.

Scenario: first date and you know you are interested in dating this person. What to wear: a skirt and a top or a dress. Not too tight or short. Show some knee but not cleavage. Don’t look like you are trying too hard. Keep your makeup natural. You have to feel good but comfortable. Maybe choose your favourite top? Remember, confidence is sexy!

Scenario: pity date (I don’t need to explain this do I?) What to wear: jeans are okay.  Hell wear high waisted or baggy jeans. A crew neck shirt. Perhaps an ill-fitting bra? Lumps are acceptable. A ponytail is encouraged. Running shoes are acceptable. Showering is optional.

Scenario: First date. You know he’s not relationship material but your hormones don’t care….you want to take him home. What to wear: This gem is key…key I say! You want to look hotter than the last girl he slept with.  So here’s the approach – one article of clothing should stand out. Chose a sexy top and sexy shoes.  Fitted pants are your best choice. No spanks (spanking may be okay if you are into that). Hair down. Cleavage is okay but tasteful. Don’t make them want to ask for a STI test first.  Choose the clothes that are wrinkle proof to make the walk of shame less obvious. (And on that note, always have sunglasses in your purse!) Be hot but not slutty.  Repeat after me, be hot but not slutty.

And the cat sweatshirt? Well I don’t even know what to say about that. But of course, it’s your call. One last piece of advice though, directly from me,  no matter what you wear, just be you. It’s all you got. And it’s enough.  (In case you are wondering about the date, we are friends and it’s awesome.)

First Date Overthinking

I guess I’m a blogger now. Not a big fancy popular one of course, but a blogger all the same. It can be hard to know where to draw the line around what to share. Yeah, we all know I’m a sharer. At times a cringe-worthy sharer. But sometimes I want to write about a really specific situation and I don’t do it because I wonder whether the person I’m talking about will read the post. What they will think? In general and of me. And will they be offended? ….So I’m debating.

Ah fuck it. It’s my truth and when have I ever held my tongue before?

I have a date on Saturday. I’m meeting a guy in person that I’ve been talking to for a couple of weeks over the phone, email and text.  It’s not an online dating hook up, it was actually an introduction through a mutual friend. Third party validation is good!  At first I was unsure. As you know, I’m gun shy. Of lots of things, but especially of getting too close to someone and getting hurt (see my last post).  I’m a middle of the night bailer remember?  So I didn’t invest anything. After all, it was just talking – no face to face contact.  And I wasn’t sure how into it I was.  But then days went on and somehow I have found myself looking forward to talking to him and today I thought about him a lot and was really excited about meeting him this weekend. How did I find myself here?

Of course, I’m still me. Which means that now I’m over-thinking (remember that post?) and doubting that this can actually go well.  Am I actually crushing on someone I’ve never met?(yeah I’ve done that before too!)  Did I somehow let him in a little? Or am I just liking the feeling of a crush?  I’m not over-thinking in that I’m wondering where this might go, or could I be hurt by this person (which is good). It’s more that I’m suspicious of myself. I keep thinking that I’ll meet him and the chemistry won’t be there. Maybe he won’t like me. Maybe I won’t like him.  I’ll have to back-peddle from the flirting I’ve done and dirty texts I’ve sent (oh yeah!).  And it will be awkward. And then what? We just don’t talk anymore?

It’s ridiculous.  I’m ridiculous.

So as I write this – which is essentially just a download of my current feelings – I’m officially going to try to stop being so lame.  I’m just going to attempt to enjoy the feeling I have right now and go with it.  This is no big deal.  It’s a first date for fuck’s sake.  Maybe we will hit it off, maybe I’ll get a good makeout session out of it (my vote!!), maybe I’ll get some action, maybe we will just be friends, maybe we will never talk again.  It’s all fine. It actually is.

So now that I have my chill pill prescription, I think I’ll pack something sexy to wear just in case. Meow!

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